This is the look of my heart....

Tomorrow is Monday, August 31st 2009.

Once a year in the remaining days that lead up to tomorrow's day, I will undertake to re-evaluate this life that I live. When the last 12 months of my life has been measured and weighed, I dare not permit myself the gall to fashion any particular positive spin onto it just so I can lie to myself that it's been a great past year. Certainly not when cumulative multiple 'Highs' could be so easily overwhelmed by the few dastardly 'Lows' to leave distaste in one's mouth.

This year, I created a list; an inventory of what currently exist within me and my life, complete with options to retain or discard the things that worked (and is still working) and those that didn't. I will refrain from sharing the more intimate details surrounding this exercise but what moods and feelings I currently harbor, I will reveal via my writings below.

This is the look of my heart
When the unforgiving cold had ravaged through
When it's not camouflaged; not shielded
This is often the look of my heart

Time and again
When heartless painters impose on it
They oft forget a smile to draw
This is thereupon the look of my heart

With each passing encounters
Violations ensues, endured
And days are mourned
This is often the look of my heart

I took chances on all
I reminisce with no regrets
Yet when the all of what is lost
This becomes the look of my heart

Unprovoked, dark unlucky days
Rocked drunken by earthly struggles
Raised a glass to toast I will
The look of this heart; a broken dandelion's heart.

"Forgive me, Lord but the dandelion's heart I am not deserving to keep...."

How to deal with strife and struggles....

"A dandelion against a whistling wind."

The ascent to the hill of the Lord is through a cumulative collection of small babysteps. For almost all of us who believes in God, it includes even our last dying breath. So I tell you the truth when I say, "Fear not". Release the false urgency you feel within so that you may breathe again. One day, one night or one event solely determines not the final outcome of the journey to this destination. Even if we fail to perform well, even if we utterly mess up, He will forgive and allow us to try again another time. For this is one of the ways of God's grace; to watch the believers who strives to not give up.

"It's going to be a long walk. I ain't going away no where, no time soon. Are you?"

Dance Of A Dandelion

IT'S RAY....

In time a distance away,

Appeared a day when all seemed right.

A tune beckoned; it's 'Sunday Morning'.

It's gay. It's happy. It's alive.

Akin to being courted by a gentle breeze,

A dandelion dances solo in full glory.

Mesmerised by the beat,

It loses itself in transitionary bliss.

The music fades.

"What's next?", she wondered.

Suddenly it came.

It's this song. It's Ray.

Odd, but it's not the same familiarity she's accustomed to.

For it's like a wind chasing down the dandelion. It's whistled.

Frozen by realization, brace yourself with a little prayer.

It just may be. And it may just be.....

Ode To An Orange Moon

In the furthest of distance,
An orange half moon I gazed.
Inhaling crisp air of a breezy night,
My thoughts wandered to wonder.
That if from where you stand,
You can witness what I see.
Then in time, you will be in unison with me.
Slowly falling for it too...